← 2014November 2014

  • Out of the ten million to-do apps for the iPhone - what do you use and why? I've bought so many, and then, have not-used the same quantity.

  • I've been trying to think of a joke about the @hilltophoods song 'Cosby Sweater' with @BillCosby but there's nothing funny about rape.

  • It'd be great to see them all come into being.

  • I seriously want a team of app developers to just be at my beck and call. I have (what I believe to be) amazing ideas every day.

  • Jurassic Park 4, Star Wars 7, Independence Day 2, Dumb and Dumber 3, Fast and the Furious 10,006. We have no more ideas for films.

  • It's the little things hey.

  • I don't even care how good your weekend is, I just saw a non-indicating temporary citizen get snapped by a radar going at least 140km/he.

  • Simply accept the new light saber you will.

  • It's so exciting that we're probably only months away from a photo of PM @JulieBishopMP and Pres. @HillaryClinton having a girls weekend.

  • It gets really good about 45 minutes in

  • Plot twist: Jurassic Park 4 and Independence Day 2 is the same movie and the dinosaurs are actually aliens.

  • Brisbane looks like a war zone.

  • This week's obsession is a podcast about starting a podcast company - aka @abexlumberg's awesome podcast network story: @podcaststartup

  • Full list of things affected by #bnestorm: everything dot com

  • #BNEstorm2711 #NeverForget

  • OMFG #bnestorm

  • If this celebrant thing doesn't work out I think I'd like to start a Queen tribute band called Queenslander Rhapsody.

  • Even though you own your own comet ...

  • Can't wait for that tweet to make it around Cannon Hill

  • Is there a plan I can just mail this pile of business cards and they send me back a file I can import into my contacts app?

  • This SEO report thing tells me my website is the 34,335th most visited website in Australia. Take that, Tony Abbott's Facebook page.

  • Im going to start a book club where we talk about all of the books we bought at that cute bookstore in DC but haven't touched since.

  • Business idea: a shopping centre without annoying people. We'll call it Westfield Heights.

  • "I found you on Reddit" - probably the best thing I've ever heard a groom say

  • Life update: I can't figure out how to get an NYC domain name registered in my name. That's all. Move along now.

  • Who do you think Charles Manson's fiancé's choices for snog and avoid were?

  • In the next 5-10 years I imagine that we'll be fundraising to send selfie sticks to kids that have to selfie with their own arms.

  • "Until I started reading your blog, the entire saga [of getting married] seemed more like a punishment than a party" - Michelle :D

  • My web hosting has been down for 46min & counting. If u can guess exactly how many mins it will be down for you'll win a sad face from me.

  • TV channel idea: 24/7 rolling coverage of toddlers dancing to pop songs filmed by their mothers. This could be amazing.

  • Whoa there, tiny dancer, whooaa. Too close.

  • Who are my web app developers on Twitter?

  • Is it Tuesday?

  • Just spent the whole shower trying to figure out which day it is. Which is probably the best way to describe self-employment.

  • Can't believe they're playing Christmas music on eBay already.

  • I feel like there needs to be a feature comedy film about all of the stupid things Microsoft has done. Starring Jen Anniston & Seinfeld.

  • "Tomorrow is often the busiest day of the year." - Spanish Proverb

  • I'm not procrastinating. I'm searching the internet for just the right folder icon to put my course documents in before I start. Gosh.

  • 2yrs ago a bunch of people though @benabrahammusic could record a sweet album, so we threw money into his @Pozible. Today we listen & enjoy.

  • In other news, I think "F* Yeah Gay Weddings is the coolest name for a wedding blog @FYgayweddings.

  • Just had an a great chat with the #G20's florist - so many cool, and classified, stories!

  • Can't wait until the year 2060 where we'll all be listening to Classic Dubstop AM radio stations.

  • Can anyone recommend an iPhone app that allows you do crop images to actual pixel sizes, like 100x100px?

  • PM Abbott could have guaranteed a long rein in Australia if he opened the #G20 with a serious warning on the dangers of drop bears.

  • I’m no @karlstefanovic but I wear the same suit a lot as well #celebrantlyf

  • Having heard the leader of the USA speak, on the same day and the leader of Australia speak, I literally can’t #G20

  • Pretty much the only thing Australia can do now is just wave a white flag and hand Obama the keys to Kirribilli #G20

  • I’m pretty sure @BarackObama just held a public intervention with @TonyAbbottMHR #G20

  • Ummm, did @BarackObama just shirtfront Putin? #G20

  • Listening to Obama speak makes you wish Australia could be lead by a statesman, not an embarrassment #G20

  • What time does Captain Planet arrive for the #G20?

  • Life would be easier if just had the voice control button replaced with a ‘Call Britt’ button.

  • I’ve got a state of the art voice control system in my car and the only thing I do is argue with it about trying to call Brittany.

  • Pen emergency #celebrantlife

  • Finally @KimKardashian and @TonyAbbottMHR are working together on a project: #BreakTheInternet

  • "Everybody's trying to leave their mark on the world. That's why there's graffiti and babies." - Kristen Schaal

  • Walked past the Brisbane Marriott today, Obama’s sleeping there Saturday night. The White House looked less secure last week! #G20

  • Just received an email that had "Sent from Surface Pro" at the bottom of it. Is this a new joke that I missed out on whilst in the states?

  • The best thing about #TheTalkShow is where @gruber tells @siracusa “let’s wrap up on this” and Overcast says there’s 40 minutes left.

  • Is anyone doing a #RedFooFacts Twitter joke thing yet? Anyone? @RedFoo?

  • Make an offer to @FakeAshPunch

  • Post holiday blues: Trying to empty my "Business to be attended to" email folder. Only matched by the joy that is my "For Quickbooks" folder

  • Is this what they mean when they say "all in a day's work"?

  • Fly from LA to Sydney, Sydney to Brisbane, drive Brisbane to Gold Coast, perform two ceremonies, and stay for the second's reception.

  • Looking forward to getting home so I can pin bad wireless internet service on @Telstra instead of free airport and cafe WiFi.

  • America, you've been good to us. A little too good with this unscheduled extra day in LA. See you in 21 hours. Australia!

  • The title of the next, next #StarWars movie has been released: Star Wars: The Force Is Grabbing A Late Brunch Today.

  • So LA’s pretty cool

  • Went past the Women's Museum in Washington DC. Seems a bit pointless, women don't ever forget anything. They need a men's museum.

  • How much kale do I need to eat to offset a pumpkin spice latte from Starbucks? Asking for a friend.

  • I’m havjng far too much fun in DC.

  • “This white man has a bigger penis than this white man” - Pretty much every advert on American TV this week #midtermelections

  • Hello Washington DC!

  • I for one welcome our new #Flyfi overlord #JetBlue

  • There's something awesome and scary about flying through turbulence at 753km per hour at 20,000 feet, watching #GOT whilst on Twitter.

  • Puerto Rico is hot, muggy, and more full of Americans than New York.