← 2015December 2015

  • New year, new @TwitterAU profile

  • "Fitness First is like a local version of Stereosonic (the music festival)"

  • I don't have a social media department 😩

  • Father-in-law hasn't lived in Sydney for 20 years but he refuses to take Google Maps on its directions #nerdproblems

  • 138.69

  • Must be terrible for 1 woman to be announced as the most objectified woman on the planet, and then 15secs later have that title taken away

  • Melbourne, you're oh so welcoming today. Any chance of the temp dipping below 30 tonight?

  • Tee shirt under a suit jacket on national TV ...

  • "I don't know why there's a battery saving option? Why doesn't it just always save battery" - Britt nails the current state of iPhone

  • When, how, why did wedding ceremonies get that boring that a guest's first thought is to photograph it instead of participate in it?

  • Wouldn't it be amazing if the whole purpose of the universe was to send cosmic guidance to 12 groups of women dependant on their DOB.

  • 2016 New Year Resolution: think about adding "Thinkfluencer" to my LinkedIn bio.

  • A progressive government would invite Kimye in to just start naming stuff. Make it rain, @TurnbullMalcolm.

  • Truth is, if you refer to me as "funky" in your enquiry email I'll probably do your wedding for free.

  • Mum just introduced me as a priest. Which probably explains her misunderstanding of my business.

  • BNE✈️CNS

  • I'm just waiting for America to invade America to disarm their weapons of mass destruction.