If there’s something strange in you neighbourhood who you gonna call? Alien Patrol!
We got to the chopper
Luna // Bunnings
Was I feeling scared, scarred, or sacred. I’m still unsure.
A lot of you have been asking where I get my under-arm deodorant from, and this is totally not sponsored, but it’s the grocery store.
Yesterday’s office // Skipper’s Canyon, NZ
Rubbing the sleep out of my eyes over a morning coffee has seen some of the “sleep” fall into the coffee. Do you drink the coffee?
From Coronet Peak to the Crown Range
The Remarkables truly are remarkable
I think I’d like to stay here a while
I have the best job in the world
Shot, blocked
❄️ First snow // Queenstown NZ
Coromandel Peak on a Monday
Whenever I see people using a Microsoft Surface in the wild, I always think they’re filming an ad for Microsoft Surface or they’re influencers.
Our unborn baby just looked up at me and said “Daddy, why do people make up things their kids said and post them on the internet?”
Now that my barber blew the cut hair off my shoulders with her coffee breath I know for a fact I’m having a worse day than you.
Most people wouldn’t realise that before Thomas Edison invented the light bulb, moths and insects were the dominate species on earth. Edison was the first person to finally control them with light bulbs.
Flying business class on Jetstar today, which is pretty much like walking with socks on instead of barefoot #JQ57
🏄♀️ like ants to a crumb
Ok, so I’ve got an idea, it’s like porn but the videos are of people replying to then archiving the last few emails in their inbox until it’s empty.
Saturday surfers at Burleigh
Nothing unites Australians more than a speed camera as we all double-flash our headlights frantically.
“One of the penalties for refusing to participate in politics is that you end up being governed by your inferiors.” — Plato
Hello, Saturday, from Australia’s Gold Coast
“The simple fact is that you most likely don’t know why your competitors are priced the way they are.” - ThinkSplendid
I wonder if motorcycle riders with loud exhausts find the polite and subtle sound of regular city cars really annoying? Or is it only us?
“There is not a religion in the world that asks you to tolerate thy neighbor” - Justin Trudeau
An Apple Camera, a fan theory
Posting a hot Apple theory I just imagined because in 5 to 10 years time, when it comes true, I want to link back to this post to proclaim how right and intelligent I was for a second.
The iPhone has a short life ahead of it. The iPad is encroaching the iPhone’s purpose on one side, and the Watch on the other. On the side of that note, the iPad is also taking up the oxygen in the market the MacBook is leaving, and the MacBook is going to retract to a desktop/home computer. So, the Apple Watch is becoming more and more powerful, and will take the “central processing unit” elements the iPhone currently provides to your personal computing life and interconnectivity.
The iPhone fades away, you’ve got an Apple Watch on your wrist, and an iPad in your backpack, and the breathing room left in the market is a camera. You don’t want to be taking photos on your 10.5" iPad and the Watch is too small to take a good photo. Does Apple leave cameras to third party manufacturers like it has monitors and wifi routers? No, it loves the camera.
From May 2018, my bold prediction for the future of Apple is an Apple Camera.
That #NappyConsent person replies, this is good: #NappyConsent Woman Deanne Carson On What She Meant
First real attempt iPad podcast remote recording - recording on an iPad Pro, on an Apogee Mic+, into Ringr, will edit on Ferrite
Fascinating long read on the commercial side of the eyeglass market and the global monopoly behind Aussie brands like OPSM, Laubman & Pank, and Sunglass Hut: The spectacular power of Big Lens
“No one in the world ever gets what they want and that is beautiful”
Why do old guys with crazy/weird hats also wear crazy/weird vests? Are crazy/weird clothing items only available in that combination deal?
Which show is the designated survivor for Designator Survivor?
Delays and cancellations through the roof in Sydney due to strong winds, thank god I jumped on an earlier flight in
Last Thursday my iPhone went into a continous restart loop, and trying to restore on iTuens doesn’t fix - it needs an Apple Store - and I’m not going to be at one til Thursday. So my Series 3 Apple Watch with LTE has become my phone. It’s not a great phone …
App idea: It’s like an ad blocker, but it’s a royal blocker. I know that reporting on the royals is how some media make money, but honestly, please just show me more ads. Maybe as I visit your site hit me with a popup begging me to opt-in, or whitelist you for royal coverage.
It’s always exciting when you find out a call centre is using a Cisco PBX. That on-hold music is everything.
Autumn // Arrowtown, NZ
tennis here
The iPad life just got a little sweeter: test recorded a podcast on my iPad Pro today using Ringr to record locally on each end, with an Apogee MiC+ on my end, and then Ringr gives me a ZIP file which Ferrite can unzip in the app, and boom, we’re editing!
Hi, my name is Josh and I’m a Kanyewesttweetsholic. I’d been clean for almost a year, but something happened this last week.
My otherwise intelligent and lovely accountant has started regular email news updates about business related laws and news, but the email subjects are in ALL CAPS. So now I’m looking for a new accountant.
April 25th
This podcast edition is a really important conversation for wedding celebrants (and humans) to have, because the words, the conversations, communications, inside a wedding are our responsibility: “Gay weddings” are not a thing, they’re just “weddings”
Straw poll: Have you ever hired a photographer or bought a photo, because of a watermark on a photo? I wonder if they’re not there for marketing reasons why else we would watermark. Copyrighted work owners deserve the right to decide how their work is used, but watermarks?
At their wedding I officiated over one year ago, it was illegal for Brendon & Brad to marry in Australia, but not today!
Great way to highlight to the public that there is a home-alone Japanese woman inside a house: a shadow boxer on closed curtains #idiocy
Hot tin roof // Kalbar, Qld
Bow of rain // Kalbar, Qld
Up standing performance
Your marriage should be better than your wedding.
For over two years I’ve been enjoying a daily tech news email with an Aussie slant plus a bit of snark called The Sizzle. While the editor is on holidays I’m one of three producing the email and we’re doing work I’m proud of + I think you’d love it.
The Monocle’s Urbanist podcast today features Brisbane’s CityCat ferry network and now I’m thinking, I’d love to catch a CityCat to BNE.
Amazon Australia has started casually leaving stuff around your house.
She likes me for meee, not because I look like Tyson Beckford
Making a big change to our business today, which I’m a little bit scared of, so if you could just reply with a “this won’t fail” comment that’d be great, thanks 🤜🏻
Byron Bay, Australia // Wednesday
Inspiring Elon Musk read via Electrek
Most of the design tolerances of the Model 3 are already better than any other car in the world. Soon, they will all be better. This is not enough. We will keep going until the Model 3 build precision is a factor of ten better than any other car in the world. I am not kidding.
Our car needs to be designed and built with such accuracy and precision that, if an owner measures dimensions, panel gaps and flushness, and their measurements don’t match the Model 3 specs, it just means that their measuring tape is wrong.
Some parts suppliers will be unwilling or unable to achieve this level of precision. I understand that this will be considered an unreasonable request by some. That’s ok, there are lots of other car companies with much lower standards. They just can’t work with Tesla.
I ❤︎ Patterns
I spent most of Ready Player One trying to figure out who was voicing i-R0k. Erlich Bachman, of course.
If you ever want to fall down a rabbit hole of wonder, just think about how someone loves you … and how that doesn’t make sense, but they love you for you. Thank you for loving me, Britt xx
📽 Ready Player One 💯
At the age of 36 I’ve found out that my last name is an “Old Norse personal name Viðarr, composed of the elements víðr ‘wide’ + ar ‘warrior’”. Joshua Wide Warrior. Ancestry dot com is the website equivalent of a high school bully.
If you’re booking VA flights here’s a 10% off economy and 30% off biz seats promo code valid for the next week: KLT69
The Blue Mountains // Sydney // Australia
When I’m president I’m going to regulate the pillows that serve no purpose industry. They’re out of control.
If you’re wondering about the exotic dream life of a marriage celebrant, last night I spent the entire night in my dreams trying to find a hotel room in Bundaberg because in my dreams I was performing a wedding there …
Proud to announce that “Navigating Sydney roads with an Apple Watch because the phone is in for repair” is the title of my next horror movie production.
Will tablet computers replace desktops/laptops? This analogy from Steve Jobs pretty much sums it up.
sunset.friday.sydney
Qantas vs Virgin
In the last year I’ve been trying out both Qantas and Virgin. I simply wondered why so many of my friends were Virgin frequent flyers.
After reaching Virgin Gold thanks to a status challenge from Qantas Platinum, I’m pretty sure I’m going to continue to keep status with Qantas. Before I list the issues with Virgin, a positive note is the extra flights and lounge opening times out of Gold Coast airport. The Qantas GC lounge isn’t open for early morning Jetstar International flights and even only opens one hour before the early morning Qantas flights. But on every other note Virgin is only an average airline. My biggest complaint being the 23kg luggage limit even for Gold frequent flyers (my PA system is 32kg). But other issues are the protein bars they call meals, their inflight entertainment app is buggy, and their iOS app is buggier. Plus, the Sydney Virgin terminal, T2, is a pain compared to Terminal 3 for Qantas in Sydney.
If you’re a Virgin flyer, you might want to know about the Qantas Tier Accelerator
On the off chance anyone cares I wrote a little piece for #TheSizzle about how I’m taking a step back from Facebook and going all in on Micro.blog
Australian wine region, the Hunter Valley “set” to become the new, New Silicon Valley of Australia /sarcasm
This sequel to The Social Network doesn’t seem to have the consistency and production values as the first movie.
record scratch freeze frame yup. that’s me. so you’re probably wondering how I got myself into this situation
Can’t believe I forgot to celebrate Rex Manning day this year
Very GC #GC2018 #GoldCoast
Oddly proud to see the Gold Coast light up this week. It’s not the ghost town it was last week. #GC2018
Ok, I hope you’re sitting down for this banger: Chicken salt, the musical. And someone call Hugh Jackman, he’s needed back home for a career defining role in Peter Brinkworth.
🌲🛁
It’s like the Skype product team have realised that the only reason people use Skype anymore is for recording podcasts
Look, I’m not going to tell you how to live your life, but if you delay feeding a cat by 30-60 minutes they get super affectionate.
I’m unsure if the Scam Artists Industry will ever recover from Tony Robbins misogyny.
African news crew in my #GC2018 car this morning asked what the crime rate on the Gold Coast was, and “where is the ghetto?” I’ve never considered how low our crime rate was, nor how blessed we are to live here.
Roy & HG praising the #GC2018 merchandise on the radio this morning: “I love the Peter Beattie doll, you wind him up and he just starts talking!”
🛶
David Letterman with Malala Yousafzai is so beautiful. ‘My Next Guest Needs No Introduction’ is a 10/10 show!
Proud to see the Gold Coast featured in the Monocle magazine’s daily email
Billion dollar business idea: a restaurant with all the markings of a hatted restaurant, but when the menu comes out, there’s only Coco Pops available for dinner. Rare, medium, or well done? Soy, almond, or full cream milk?
Anyone in any good Slack groups they think I should be in?
Reading Jonathan Kim’s Medium piece on the three stages of April criticism and all of my anti-Apple mates come to mind. Read this, you’ll love it.
I think @agenda might be the calendar/notes combo app I’ve been looking for, once there’s a good iPad/iPhone app. Khoi’s review is pretty much what I would say about it.
What do people not on social media get anxious about?
A year ago today, Stevie went more viral than any of us
Do these #GC2018 opening ceremony bongo players with Delta Goodrem have the required permits?
Jingeri #GC2018
Someone recently asked me what makes me who I am, why would people invite me to fly around the globe to be their marriage celebrant?
I think it’s because I care. I believe that your marriage matters, that it’s a once in a lifetime kind of love, and I think your wedding ceremony matters. But I think your marriage should be better than your wedding. And I think that the best part about a wedding is the ceremony.
Today’s the day #GC2018
I’ve written my first edition of The Sizzle! It’s heading out to inboxes soon :) subscribe at www.thesizzle.com.au
I think hustling might have jumped the shark.
In August due to a flight change I now have six hours in San Francisco, and I’m pretty excited having never been. Where should a nerd like go in six hours? Apple Park?!
Diving into another perfect Gold Coast day volunteering at #GC2018 Commonwealth Games
All of the big Internet companies want your private data, but Cloudflare’s business model looks transparent and I think this is a service worth using your protect yourself online: 1.1.1.1
My kind of April Fools gag is a Seth Godin April Fools gag
Watching Qld Police officers, highly trained in bringing down criminals, embarrassingly bring down the letter of the law on rogue bongo drummers in Burleigh Park.
The USA is proposing reviewing social media of nearly everyone seeking entry and I’m really looking forward to their riveting critique of my 3GB Facebook archive, almost 80,000 tweets, and 6,000 Instagram posts.
There is nothing more exciting on earth today than this Twitter thread
There’s a primary school in Torres Strait, the far northern tip of Queensland, Australia, that has no books for the students. It would be so cool if everyone sent them a children’s book!
People are losing their mind as Pope Francis says ‘Hell does not exist,', which is great and all that, but why don’t we just ‘fess up and say we simply don’t know & the information we’ve got on the subject is sketchy.
A 2007 article by Victor Keegan arguing that MySpace had a monopoly and it was too hard for it’s users to leave.
Your fortune teller isn’t as good as David Gerrold
I’ve just checked into my hotel for the night and I think I’ve been drafted to represent Scotland in the #GC2018 Commonwealth Games
Seeing this photo makes me feel extraordinarily proud
“The truth is, we could make a ton of money, if we monetized our customer - if our customer was our product. We’ve elected not to do that.” - Apple CEO, Tim Cook, commenting on Facebook’s business model.
Apple’s constant efforts to win over schools and students isn’t a silly effort. My first computer experience was an Apple IIe in Grade Five, then using my uncle’s Macintosh in the early 90s cemented it. I wanted an Apple computer.
Humans, we aren’t going to beat the computers if it takes this airline staff member 14 minutes to figure out there’s no direct Vancouver-Gold Coast flights.
Doc Searls makes a pretty good point about what the rest of the year is going to look like in the news (OMG Amazon is tracking me!)
This piece in the NYTimes on teachers has my brain going down a different tangent. What do “professions” and “degrees” mean in a society that values them less everyday?
I wonder how many small or independant businesses are prepared for a 38% drop in Facebook favourability, which for some may lead to a 38% drop in business.
One of the best local podcasts going around is Scotty Mac’s Brisbane is Weird, and the latest ep about the the Battle of Brisbane is about Brisbane’s shameful American past.
Is there an award for the most number of times you’ve left your Kindle e-reader in a hotel room or on a plane? Asking for a friend.
If you invoice with Xero, did you know that for free you can connect it to Stripe, and let your customers pay you with credit card? It even lets you on-charge the credit card fee #pleasedothiseveryone
J&C #marriedbyjosh #photographedbyjosh
An issue more people should consider is that your content and your data, is yours. You should own it. But it’s all locked up in Facebook (and other networks) and competition is severly limited because of the high costs of switching to a new network. This needs to change.
There’s a new edition of the most niche podcast we could think of, an Australian marriage celebrant podcast. But hey, you can listen if you want.
Remember back in the olden days we had day themes for social media content, Micro.blog has that in the form of Micro Monday and I’ll nominate @ismh if only because he’s at least active here ✌🏼
It’s an easy week to bash social media, even I’ve been doing it, but it’s brought all of us closer together, so it can’t be all that bad.
But if you want to know how I’m changing up my social media habits, lets chat offline about it.
The most exciting thing about Trump’s presidency is that all future world leaders can say “Look, I don’t threaten porn star’s children’s lives” and we’ll be so overjoyed with their high-level morals.
Driving out of Sydney Airport feels just like leaving Denpasar Airport now. Same road designers?
How to cook soup. First, you need some water.
“The name Christian now aligns me with gun-toting preachers, damnation-wielding social media trolls and predatory Presidents. It now aligns me with the least-like-Jesus stuff I can imagine.” — John Pav
As the bible says, “Let any one of you who has not thrown around the idea of possibly destroying a nation’s ethics over a long lunch, be the first to throw a Cricket ball at him.”
13 reasons to believe tha aliens exist … click through to get your conspiracy theories on!
Before you sink/lose your life-savings on crypto currencies, read “Attack of the 50 Foot Blockchain: Bitcoin, Blockchain, Ethereum & Smart Contracts”
I can’t lie to you, I like the idea of hitchiking the world - story in the NY Times magazine
Officials in Schuylkill County (USA) are teaching students to throw rocks at school shooters … not The Onion, actual real news
Humbled daily by the couples that invite me into their marriage ceremony. A couple from Montreal have just asked me to be their celebrant in Vancouver!
“Our job now is to find new tasks, human tasks, faster than the computer takes the old ones away. Too often, people are displaced and then give up.” – Seth Godin
Neapolitan Mountain
Outriggers
I wish everyone in my world would invest the 20min to listen to this podcast ep about social media & mental health so we could all be on the same page - Ask Sciene Mike episode 145
Want Facebook to stop using your name in vain? Turn the setting off at facebook.com/settings/…
Apple has proposed new inclusive emojis. The inclusive nature of Apple’s business culture inspires me.
The last conversation you’ll ever need to have about eating right - bookmarking this one.
“Keto gives people the impression they’ve lost fat” - @juliaoftoronto in Vox
“80 per cent of homes are selling at a loss”The mining boom’s biggest legacy seemingly will be the mortgages worth more than the houses.
“Where’s the line on hate speech? I mean, who chose me to be the person that did that?” - Mark Zuckerberg realising the responsibilities of popularity
“Facebook will never stop collecting and exploiting that data. It is all they have.” - John Birmingham’s Alien Side Boob, 23/3/18
“Business wise, a brand would benefit more from working with a thought leader, who has 5000 real and engaged followers, who could become real and paying 5000 customers, than a buzzword thrower with 20k-50k followers (or more) who are only following thanks to herd behavior and who are not likely to pay for a product or a service. Real thought leaders care and make a point to be knowledgeable about the topics they cover.”
This ‘welcome to the Gold Coast street lights sign/artwork’ is no better when you’re looking at it straight on and in the air … I hate to jump on bandwagons, but this is a pretty supreme waste of public funds. I love the Gold Coast, I’m 100% behind #GC2018, but this sign is silly on so many fronts.
“Up until the early 2000s, the only people that lived here full time was me and my family and the people in the Big Brother House. That and a few retirees.”
Did You Know? There’s Actually A Community Of People Who Live On The Gold Coast Full-Time
Honest Wes Anderson trailer Youtube link
Sydney is now more expensive to live in than New York and LA. (It’s actually cheaper for me to fly there every week than live there)
1989's Macintosh Portable
I could spend the rest of my days watching old technology product releases and IK’d be a happy boy // this is from1989, the Macintosh Portable, being introduced by Jean-Louis Gassée who still today writes a really great email called the Monday Note Watch the Macintosh Portable launch
Pro Marriage Tip: Stress = low libido. Enough said.
Love t.co/ZnLXIAkh9…
Sing us a song, you’re the Piano Man t.co/U4T7VJXm6…
Love
Is this thing on?
Literally, adding value and demanding loyalty t.co/vHplNmZbV…
City Cat On A Hot Tin Roof t.co/9Wf5gUsz4… t.co/lQu2QakNh…
That’s the Josh Withers guarantee.
A&K come in for a meeting about their marriage ceremony and we end up talking about getting a haircut for 30 minutes.
One thought per break t.co/ojuRCoEq4…
Cranes on the skyline 🤑 t.co/ZCHTawMCu… t.co/flKXoBZXr…
Literally, adding value and demanding loyalty t.co/xC3t0T7jx…
From the @unpopularist💡 Literally, adding value and demanding loyalty t.co/DYBaMVkLS…
One thought per break t.co/4suLBZwvx…
Best bot ever t.co/ITvSxWY90…
Everyone isn’t terrible t.co/RoRBLVDEN…
“Josh kicked off our special day by conducting the ceremony exactly as we described to him” - Joel + Liezl 📷 Hannah Blackmore Photography t.co/gzKElbdSK…
Rush hour t.co/qgwdXhDNu… t.co/R0YiMs8Vi…
It’s just me and Blacklist t.co/Ik1H8vchD…
🏄🏾♀️🚁🌊 t.co/DdDbrEqTm… t.co/W1TsI2k0A…
From the @unpopularist💡 One thought per break t.co/fPGBNJlwk…
Everyone isn’t terrible t.co/cxpOBxkqE…
Everything’s swell t.co/FXWXNy124… t.co/HC8Uq6LmG…
As if Islamic State isn’t going to claim this … even if it didn’t it’s a hot grab for their “cause”
We’re paid to give a … t.co/d0aH0jpW7…
Is it ok to show off my girl on here? :) t.co/XL4BggNvk…
A shore thing t.co/M0TZYjGri… t.co/YKUOAb8Op…